Little Bits of Pixie Dust

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body thourougly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO, what a ride!!"

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Finding Jules

Well, I did it. Those of you who have read my previous blogs will remember the entry "D Misses her Best Friend". If you didn't, then go back in my archives and read it already! Anyway, I have not been in contact with my best friend in about four to five months. I don't really know why. I wasn't agreeing with some of the choices that she was making, so maybe she sensed this and moved herself away, I don't know. Or maybe it was something as simple as time passed and we just didn't know how to make the first move. I honestly don't know. But today I took matters into my own hands and mailed her a card. Anyone who knows me knows that cards are a very important part of my life. I love nothing better than to find someone a card perfect for whatever occasion, and then I will write on the entire inside of the card and onto the back. Whenever A* opens a card, he scans the long writing and says "Oh God, do I have to read this whole thing?" (He does have to read the whole thing, if you were wondering) So I got this gorgeous card with a beautiful picture of a butterfly on the outside and was blank on the inside and wrote a short novel. I wrote about our friendship, how much it and she mean to me, how much I miss her, all of the things that I have been saving up to tell her because she is the only one who would understand. I am hoping so much that she will open this card, read it and be touched, and make the effort to get back in touch with me. The last time I talked to her she didn't have a phone, hence mailing the card. But I included our new phone number so that she can call me whenever she is ready. I hope against all hope that she will. I don't know what I will do if she just out and out rejects me, because that is what I feel no response would be. It would definitely crush me. She really has been there for every milestone, every important thing in my life starting from the age of fifteen. I can't imagine having a wedding without her being the maid of honor. I can't imagine the birth of my first child without her in the room with me. I can't imagine the rest of my life without her in it.
She means the world to me, and I miss her more than I could express here. She has been my guardian angel more times than I can mention, and on more than one occasion she has literally saved my life.
Keep hoping for me, and I will keep you posted. I want to find my best friend more than anything. I really miss her.


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