Little Bits of Pixie Dust

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body thourougly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO, what a ride!!"

Tuesday, November 13, 2012


There are certain mornings when I shouldn’t even be expected to try and come to work; certain mornings when I have already worn myself out by the time I need to get in the car and come to do work where I get paid.

C. still wears diapers at night; he’s completely potty trained during the day but hasn’t mastered the night time stuff yet. So this morning when I picked him up to give him a good morning hug, I noticed that he was considerably damp. I took him to the other room to get him dressed and out of his wet pajamas; when I pulled his pants down and took the diaper off, he had not only gone pee, if you know what I mean. In the split second before I could open my mouth, C. had stepped right in the nastiness. Of course, this caused a meltdown of epic proportions and though I was yelling, “Don’t put your foot down, don’t put your foot down!” I’m sure you can guess that he put his foot down. Now there were little brown footprints on the carpet. I calmed C. down and plunked him in the bathtub, throwing the dirty diaper in the trash on the way. Apparently I didn’t close the bag or the lid all the way, because when I went back out into the living room to scrub the carpet I found the dog making a yummy snack out of the vile old diaper. Sigh. Now I had a naked, whiny child, dirty carpet, and a dog that I just wanted to set on fire because I just think he’s completely disgusting.

Please also keep in mind that I am NOT a morning person and this all took place before 7:00 in the morning. Foolishly, I continued on to work, where I discovered that my internet radio connection isn’t working and I went out on a limb and tried a different bagel flavor because they were free and it tasted like ass. Now the hours are dragging on and on and it’s not even lunch time yet. I should have stayed in bed.


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